February 29, 2012

Ahead



Today I watched both The Vow and Suddenly 30. (No shame, guys). They had a particular thing in common, aside from obviously being chick flicks. They depict characters that for some reason or another find themselves at a point in their life where they attain no memory of part of their previous selves. They jumped part of their life and had to make sense of whom they now were.

Sometimes I really wish I knew who I’d be in ten years. Last week was one of those weeks when the present seems a little too hard. In those moments I found myself thinking that it would be nice to know where I’d be in ten years. To know whom I’m married to, what my job is, who my friends are. Not every single detail that occurs in my whole life, but just a simple knowledge of a few key things. Not to go back and change anything, but to give me a comfort that I’m hopefully going in the right direction. I feel that if I knew these things now it would take away a lot of the stress and the worry that those things may sometimes cause me.

While that sounds appealing in some regards, the other side of the spectrum is that knowing those things would take the fun out of life. Yes it may minimise worry now, but it would enable me to completely miss the joy of some of my future life experiences. If I can fast forward to my wedding and know whom I’m going to marry, that will ruin the whole experience of discovering them and falling in love. If I knew now the exact job I will have, it gives me no chance to be excited in the unknown and to learn to do what I love. If I already know exactly who my friends will be in ten years, it leaves nothing to chance and everything to plans.

Life is meant to be unknown. That’s why it’s called the future and not the past. Shit happens, but so does a hell of a lot of good stuff. And that’s the fun of it. I’m excited to live my life and to see what happens, day by day.


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